Ugh...

I have discovered that there is no faster way to feel like a complete ass than to shoot a music video. I am not an actor. I do not comfortably emote with my face in a way that can be seen 20 feet away. And when the camera rolls, it magically makes me forget all the words to the song I wrote. I feel like a big fat asshole with a guitar.

Working in front of a greenscreen is kind of like this picture, but with 100 billion more lights. Hot, bright lights. THOUSANDS OF THEM. It was very hard not to squint and scowl. 

If you want to simulate the experience, try this at home: take out the metal racks in your oven and set it on broil. Then lay face up with your head on the bottom of the oven, and stare straight at the broiler heating element. The oven door will make it impossible to lay flat without painfully twisting your back into an unnatural position - that's okay, it's part of the experience. Next, get two high output halogen lamps and place one on either side of your head as close to your eyes as possible. Turn the lights on the highest possible setting. But don't squint, not ever. You'll ruin the shot. Now, while remaining absolutely motionless, sing along with a five minute song you can barely hear. Don't forget to replicate with exact precision every nuance of your vocal and instrumental timing from the recording session, or you'll ruin the shot. Don't forget to not squint, no matter how bright the lights are. Don't move around, no matter how much your back aches. Don't look at the lights, ever. And it's gonna get hot in there, but for the love of god, don't sweat. You'll ruin the shot. Got all that? Good, now do it 25 more times, but with more feeling, and then we'll call it a day. And don't forget to smile this time OR YOU'LL RUIN THE FUCKING SHOT.